//Like so many of the headlines popping up on my timelines about how social media is detrimental to our stamina and emotional well-being (not to mention our mental, emotional, & physical health), I've felt drained recently. There was no particular thing that set this off, there wasn't a final tweet that was the proverbial straw on my phone's back, but something finally reminded me that it was time to check in with myself.
So often, we check in on others and neglect ourselves. I send cards, flowers, texts, soup, letters, voicemails, even playlists to my people when I check on them but all too rarely do I take the time to cultivate space for me; to see how my subconscious is doing. She's quieter than my conscious self and I forget how easy it is to drown her out. The beach has proven to be a beautiful place for this reflection -- the calm of the ocean, the embrace of the sand, and the heat of the sun all come together in this açai smoothie bowl for the soul-kind of way that always helps to bring me back to my neutral, my base.
looking to the universe// I am an inherently spiritual person. Looking to the universe and the energy I can feel in the world around me for guidance has always felt second nature. As such, in a time where our human world has felt so in chaos, the energy of the universe has calmed me. My connection to the universe and to the energy I feel is a very personal one to me, which is why I tend to be rather sparse with the intricacies of it here on the blog, but lately I have felt such a loving kindness enveloping me, pushing me towards the great things to come and steeling me against the inevitable not-so-greats. Yoga, my family, and my summer have all helped that too. (If you're interested, I tend to follow my horoscope and Tracy's weekly readings have proven to be oh-so dangerously accurate)
feeling through yoga// one of the newest additions to my life, yoga has completely and totally changed me forever; so much so that the topic deserves its own post for another time. I will say that in my search for authenticity, yoga keeps me as honest and as authentically me as I can get. I leave every single class having learned something new and I've been so moved by the privilege to witness firsthand the incredible impact yoga has on the lives of those who practice. Personally, I always leave my mat (either as teacher or practitioner) in a calmer, stronger space than I was in before. Yoga reminds me of my inner strength, my adaptability, and my resilience. I've mentioned before that the act of teaching has brought me to new levels of comfort within my own skin, and the rhythm of yoga practice in my life marries the familiar and the new.
practicing the art of complex simple// working as a camp counselor at a girls summer camp brings me so much joy, exhaustion, and knowledge all together. I learn as much from the kids as I hope they're learning from me & from them I've learned the art of complex simple. To us adults, kid's problems may seem simple, even trivial. But I've learned to reexamine my priorities thanks to my kids and their 'simple' worries; and believe me what strangers think of me or the number of likes I get on social media has firefighter pole-descended to the bottom of the list. But hidden within kids 'simple' matters are very complex emotions and beliefs. See, my kiddos know that they can't actually fly to the moon. But choosing to believe that they can requires a superpower I'm sad to have lost in the throes of my own childhood. This kind of blind faith is a complex thing, especially for adults, and I'm still learning to tap into it.
an overdose of social media// I've spent so much of my life either mindlessly scrolling through social media or missing out on my life by trying to get the perfect picture, digitally blurring my blemishes or pinching my waist so the girl in the pictures appears a mere sliver of my true self. It's a special kind of apathy that has taken me over when it comes to social media lately. Normally a terrible, stagnant feeling, this kind of apathy has released me from feeling the pressure I used to put on myself to be perfect. My Instagram, in particular, has become a treasure trove of my wonderfully imperfect memories. The emotion in my face is much more important than whether or not I'm makeup-free, or if there's a bit of spinach in my teeth, or if my hair looks wilder than wild.
bombshell// this space has grown with me through the years, and nothing could be more fun (and sometimes cringe-worthy) than looking back on my earliest posts. Abandoning the blog would be like abandoning one of the most creative parts of myself, if nothing else it has been a wonderful exercise in forcing myself to write, and I'm not ready to say goodbye. What I am ready to say goodbye to is the constant comparing myself to other bloggers, to the journeys and incomes and perfect pictures of other blogs. This is my journey to share with everyone who chooses to read along and I refuse to do us all a disservice by trying to do what every other blog is doing to boost my readership or to work with brands.
Thanks for sticking around my loves, our next chapter is shaping up to be the greatest one yet.
xx
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